To know whether you are in the right relationship or not you first need to know what kind of relationship you want. It’s not how someone looks, how much they earn, or what job they have that will determine the perfect match. Instead, it’s how someone makes you feel that is the essential. If your significant other makes you feel more confident, creative, inspired and motivated I dare to say that you are in the right place.
Most of us have been victims to moments when our emotions have taken over our reason. But somewhere somehow, if you listen really carefully to yourself you often know the answer of whether the one you are with is really “the one”. You may not see it right away, or if you do – you may be too weak to act on it, because “maybe things will change”.
Yes, situations will always change. But you can never change someone else into being someone that they are not. The only person that you can change is yourself. However, if you realise that you start becoming someone that you don’t recognise yourself with, there is most likely negative influences in your social environment. As I wrote in a previous article “Your social environment is key” for your own well-being.
The most important is the nature of the relationship
Instead of focusing on “the perfect person”, try to look for what kind of relationship you want. For example, do you value to spend a lot of time together with your partner, or do you think it’s more important to spend time with friends? Do you value your professional career the most or do you rather want to focus on a committed family life? Do you want to work on projects with your partner or rather ride solo in your hobbies?
Even if we supposedly live in an open and free society, judgement will still be put on everything that we say and do. Depending on your age and occupation these may differ. But in general, to be in Charles and my age it’s not always celebrated to choose to stay at home and work on things together, but rather you must “keep your doors open” to everything and everyone.
Therefore, it’s not surprising that in the short time that Charles and I have been officially working together, we have already met a lot of scepticism. Especially from others in our age. It confirms the general fear of commitment. Many tell us “It’s not good to work with your partner” or “It’s too soon”. Charles wrote a great article where he concretely explains all the benefits that we find to work together. Two brains are always better than one.
Most of you may not know that Charles and I have only known each other for six months. But it was clear from day one that we share the same passion, enthusiasm and dream to start a creative platform – so why wait? Today, too many go through life hesitating, questioning and doubting. They ask themselves when is it conventional to commit? When should we take the next step? Move in together? Get engaged? If you have to follow all the conventions of when you are “supposed” to do things, to start a business can seem very far away. And if you start taking into account “what if”, a joint business is probably excluded all together.
Numerous of our acquaintances have said “What if it ends?”. The answer is simple: If you already plan that your relationship will end you should NOT start a business together. In fact, you should probably not stay in the relation at all. Every joint project comes with additional commitment. First and foremost you must be true to yourself. If you are true in the relation and with your feelings to one another, you have come a long way. Thereafter you can start considering whether you are personally ready to embark on a professional journey as well. If the answer is genuinely yes for the two of you, there is nothing in the way to stop you.
When is the perfect timing?
We think that there is never a perfect timing. You are the one who has to create it by own choice. We chose now. Looking around us considering everything that is going on in the world, we don’t know what will happen tomorrow. It has become even more important to focus on today. If you have a dream, go for it today or it might never happen.
Everyone can talk about all the things they plan to do, but few people actually do it. What is it that counts in the end? All the things you said or the things you did? The same logic applies to build a strong and healthy relationship: It’s not enough to just say that you love, but you need to show that you love. Actions say more than words. This is another reason why we chose to go for our dream straight away. Because we cannot build a platform where we encourage others to be courageous and do what they love if we don’t do it ourselves.